I hoping to try to get back into blogging a little bit...my thoughts on this blog, and our family memories on our family blog. To say that my brain feels a little bit foggy right now is quite an understatement! Life has been crazy around here lately. But, I was thinking on my way home from some time spent with my dear friends this morning and I would love to try to put into words some of what I was thinking about.
I love my little discipleship group from church. I try very hard not to take for granted what a priceless gift I have been given. There are 7 of us, and we have been together, meeting once a week faithfully, with lots of other play dates in between, for 2 years now. We have already been through so much together! We have grieved extreme losses together, rejoiced and celebrated together, and we are even starting to experience conflict together. I love how different we all are, and how that only enhances the depth of our interactions. We all parent differently (although all aiming to disciple our children in the truths of the Gospel), dress differently, cook differently, spend free time differently, spend money differently...you get the point. And yet, I am just now getting to the point where I really can say that I don't feel judged with them. That was my "ah-ha" moment this morning. I was in awe over how I just walked away from time with other moms where there was so much room for hurt feelings and judgement and misunderstandings....and yet instead there was just helping, serving, loving, and jumping in it all together. We had a crazy morning together...one of those days where you are trying to get something done together among toddler squabbles, screaming babies, and loud toys that should have never had a battery put in them. The issue of how to get a baby to sleep well came up. Two women said they let their babies cry it out, while two of us rock our babies to sleep. I usually fear judgement when this subject comes up. When I "complain" or vent about how difficult a day was because my baby had a harder time going to sleep and I had to be in the nursery longer, I would fear other moms thinking I got myself into my own problem by being too soft. Whereas, a mother who lets her babies cry to sleep might fear other moms thinking she is cruel or not nurturing. Really, this parenting issue is not really worth all the judgement and hurt feelings. Parenting is hard, no matter how you feel led to approach it. Whether you Babywise it, Attachment Parent it, or a combo of both...it's just hard, and no one can really master it, no matter how hard you try. Once you feel like you have "conquered" one challenge, your baby/child goes through another stage and you are faced with one or many more struggles to tackle. So instead of adding judgement to the mix of struggles, we should all be loving and serving each other through these years, encouraging each other in the ways we each feel led to parent, pushing each other to cling to Jesus in the midst of hard, hard days.
So, I realized what a gift we have, because I finally feel like this is where we are most of the time. And I love it. I think the reason we have been able to get to this point is because it is a gift from Jesus, and we know each other so well. How could I judge one of my dear sisters who I have literally walked through trials with, spent countless days with, knowing the love they have for their children and the depth of their desire to nurture their children in the grace of Christ? And why should I fear judgement from them when they have experienced the same with me? Time, suffering, shouldering burdens, prayer, and the grace of Christ has grown such a deep love that truly does remove the sting of judgement. It is so freeing to be able to live life with these women.
So, once again, I am reminded of God's perfect plan in creating us for community. It is such a beautiful gift in a fallen world. The gift of community is so worth the time and risk of being authentic and getting real with the people God has placed in our lives! And I don't want to paint an inaccurate picture of our day, by the way. I'm sure we are all in need of some peace and quiet....and maybe a drink....this evening! It was crazy. But how wonderful that love, service, and just being together made it so much more bearable and even joyful! That's why the hard is worth it.
2 comments:
Tears while reading this. Thanks for putting what I feel into words. It is such a gift to live without judgement. What a free place. I always feel it when I come home from China to my family, church and discipleship group. The grace that is given to me through you guys is so palpable after a week of spiritual oppression. I love you guys and need you really badly!
"So instead of adding judgement to the mix of struggles, we should all be loving and serving each other through these years, encouraging each other in the ways we each feel led to parent, pushing each other to cling to Jesus in the midst of hard, hard days." Loved those words, great post friend! Totally agree! :)
Post a Comment